This Viral Rant is a Masterclass in Spotting AI Slop

10 signs of AI slop. Don’t worry. Your em dash is safe.

AI slop disco with a DJ plague doctor | Created with Midjourney and a six-fingered model

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Every few weeks, a new piece of rage-poetry erupts across social media. They all have the same saccharine flavor: florid metaphors stacked like pancakes with adjectives ladled on until the plate buckles under its own syrupy weight. (Hungry! I missed breakfast.)

Case in point: a viral screed currently circulating under the byline Oliver Kornetzke — a Substack writer whose only publishing footprint is, well, a Substack blog started a few months ago.

The text has been reposted on Facebook, TikTok, and Goodreads, usually in glowing tones of “this is the best thing I’ve ever read.” Oddly, the viral post was gussied up and presented as if it were printed in a reputable newspaper. Not quite. Its origins are a FB Post.

The full text:

“Behold. The festering carcass of American rot shoved into an ill-fitting suit: the sleaze of a conman, the cowardice of a draft dodger, the gluttony of a parasite, the racism of a…